I have recently been catching myself, saying, “Stop it!” to the whispers in my head. Usually, I’d go with the flow to whatever it tells; I’d join in. Eager to follow its path. Even if it leads me to a treacherous route or unconsciously embrace me with its wrath, I was open, willing, and victim.
Ahh, I have learned to filter since then.
Any whisper of negativity, shame, tease, put-downs, criticisms, and the like, I have learned to stop the moment I hear it. I feel like I have guards securing the gates of my heart checking every thought, every voice, every little effect of getting in.
The guards, I have learned, have to be awake and aware continually. But there are times when they are hungry and tired, that they tend to give in most of the time and allow temptations and all the other spirits to get in.
And it’s not favorable.
The question isn’t about what I regularly do every day, but am I learning from any of it? Because until something makes sense, until something clicks and hits me in the head to awaken me, then I would go round and round like in a merry-go-round until it’s ready to stop, and I remain the same.
And I don’t want that.